Yusef, you bastard, did you replace the antiseptic in my adhesive medical strips with Tabasco sauce? A commendable effort, but you’re still such a bastard!
Yusef, You Bastard IX
Yusef, you bastard! How is it that my living room is the setting for the winning entry in the “Best Group-Sex Scene – Video” category in the recent Adult Film Awards?
Yusef, You Bastard VIII
Yusef, if that was your semen I tasted in my coffee, I’m going to beat you to death with a small puppy very very soon.
Yusef, You Bastard VII
Yusef, you bastard, get away from me with that thing. I don’t need a pap-smear! No, I KNOW you’ve only got my interests at heart. Now fuck off!
Yusef, You Bastard VI
Yusef, that Cabbage Patch Dolls/My Little Pony bestiality diorama you left on my lawn this morning was frankly disturbing. I worry about you, Yusef, I really do.
Yusef, You Bastard V
Yusef, put that tube back in. No, I don’t care what you need it for, Father O’Leary’s dialysis machine needs it more!
Yusef, You Bastard IV
Yusef, you mad arab bastard, STOP sending transgender fetishist prostitutes to my house when you know I have company!
Yusef, You Bastard III
Yusef, you bastard, did you post “male to male escort” fliers with my details at every train station in town? You utter, utter bastard!
Yusef, You Bastard II
Yusef, you bastard, just LISTEN to me when I say I don’t have your prosthesis in my freezer! No, I don’t know who has it. Just put your penis away and go HOME.
Yusef, You Bastard I
It WAS black, not green! Yusef, you owe me a carton of cigarettes and the use of your sister for a night!
